Update On Life!

I know that I have not wrote a blog in a while. I am just not feeling myself anymore. It's getting worse. My life is falling apart more and more each day. I went to the doctor March 6th to get a refill on my Prozac (Depression Medicine) and they up'd my dose since it was not working. The new one is either not working or still has not kicked in yet. I feel dead. I cry a lot more. I did not eat nothing yesterday and this morning I looked and I lost a pound. I was so happy. But then I realized you could not tell so I was still fat... so I got upset. I also texted my mom today during school and asked if we could get me someone to talk to about all my problems. She said we would look into it. I am trying to hint to her more and more how bad I am. I'm scared to tell her that I think about dying and I cut. I don't want her to think I am crazy. I don't want my sister finding out either. She judges me to badly. It hurts.I post quotes from Tumblr on my Instagram and share them with my Facebook so she will see.  I noticed another type of self harm that I have been doing. I bite myself. I know it sounds gross or nasty or stupid. But I do it. I have done it along time now and its getting worse. It's like I like the "pain". I always have this urge where if I look at my hands or arm I have to bite. I feel stupid. I don't know anyone who does this. Well dinner is almost ready and since my mom is home tonight I have to eat. We are having grilled chicken so that will be okay. Stay strong beautiful, we are in this together; I promise ♥ 
XOXO.

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Twitter: Brittany5Bieber
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